From a Prayer Partner – (posted 3/31/2008, by Todd, on http://toddnettleton.blogspot.com)
Last week I received an Easter letter from Dr. Jim Garlow, a best-selling author and the pastor of Skyline Church, one of the largest churches in the Wesleyan denomination. I'm not sure how I got on Dr. Garlow's Easter letter list; I've met him and heard him speak, but I'd say I know who he is more than I know him. Yet his letter contained a nugget of truth that has come to my mind many times since it arrived in my email box. Here's a portion of his letter: Carol (Jim's wife) was diagnosed with primary peritoneal (ovarian type) cancer in June 07, resulting in a seven hour surgery, removing over 100 tumors, which caused multiple stays in the hospital, trips to ER's, seven weeks of nausea, six rounds of chemo and a sudden 57 lb. weight loss… Cancer is horrible. It changes everything. It makes "normal" out of reach. However, it does have some serendipitous impact. For starters, we really cling to God more now. Secondly, (as noted above) I am so aware of how interdependent I am. I needed others. Many others. Thirdly, Carol and I have fallen in love – very deeply. Thirty seven years of marriage plus the uncertainty that cancer brings has resulted in us being honeymooners again. We are very clingy – wanting to be together all the time. I touch her, hold her, kiss her every chance I can.
During the eight months following the June diagnosis, I cancelled everything to become a primary caregiver. One night, while cleaning the carpet after Carol had experienced a serious bout with nausea, I heard God say, "this is the best ministry you have ever had." And it was. Read that last paragraph again. THE BEST MINISTRY YOU'VE EVER HAD.
This is a man who has preached to thousands. Dr. Garlow is a man who effectively leads a very large church with lots of great ministry; he has defended the gospel on national television. A man who has written gospel-promoting books that ended up on the New York Times best seller list. He has a daily radio feature that is heard across the country. In the Christian world, this guy is big time! Yet in cleaning up vomit for his sick wife he heard God's approving voice say, "This is the best ministry you've ever had."
Men, there is a lesson here for us. Husbands and fathers, listen! It is not in the thousands that our best ministry is found, it is in the wife and children God has entrusted to us. I believe that our public, "big-time" ministry is undermined when it is built over top of the neglect of those closest to us. I believe that if you aren't ministering to your wife and children, God may not be nearly as taken with your ministry as you are. And as I verbally point fingers, know that I'm pointing at myself too.
My wife became pregnant about nine months into our marriage, and with her pregnancy came "morning" sickness. Raw meat made her sick. Our toothpaste made her sick. Things that hadn't bothered her the previous day made her sick. She was sick often. I tried to say nice things and keep her spirits up. And, as she knelt at the porcelain throne, I stood behind her and held her long brown hair up out of the way. I didn't think much about it. I was surprised months later when she told me how much that meant to her, that I held her hair while she threw up. To her it was a symbol of my love and commitment, a sign that I'd stick around even when things got tough and nasty and uncomfortable. Perhaps, in those moments, was found some of the best ministry I'll ever have.
